"No event in American history is more misunderstood than the Vietnam War. It was misreported then, and it is misremembered now. Rarely have so many people been so wrong about so much. Never have the consequences of their misunderstanding been so tragic. ~Richard M. Nixon

"I'm sorry, Lieutenant Goldman," Major Darling sniffed in his small, condescending voice, "but I don't remember asking you what you want to do. You're going to Da Lat. End of discussion."

Myron Goldman stood in front of the commanding officer's desk, his jaw quivering as he fought the impulse to wring the major's arrogant little neck. Summoning more composure into his voice than he would have believed possible, the first lieutenant asserted, "Sir, all I'm saying is that with Sergeant Anderson on leave, my first duty is here, with my men."

"Your first duty, Lieutenant, is to follow orders." Darling lowered himself into his comfortable leather chair without taking his eyes off of the junior officer. "And those orders are to go to Da Lat to see the general about a special assignment he has for you." Recognizing Goldman's intention to barrage his CO with yet another round of protest, Major Darling straightened his back and leaned forward, resting his bony wrists on the tidy surface of the large metal desk. "Dismissed, Lieutenant," he snapped, his gaunt lips curling in a smug, almost undetectable grin.

Goldman held his ground a moment longer, his eyes narrow, his mouth thin. The major's inflated ego filled the room, inducing in Goldman a sudden urge to puke. Abandoning any hope that he might change the other man's stubborn mind, Lieutenant Goldman raised his elbow in a short, obligatory salute. Without waiting for Darling's return, the platoon leader turned and exited the base commander's office, slamming the door behind himself.

***********

The flight to the Army base at Da Lat had thus far been uneventful. Practically boring, as far as Myron Goldman was concerned. Except for the crew chief who stared down at the world from behind the machine gun lodged in the Huey's open doorway, Goldman was alone in the passenger compartment. The lieutenant had little to do but seethe in his contempt for Major Darling, the general he was traveling to see, the whole fucking Army and the whole fucking war

Myron was cognizant of the fact that he was making the chopper crew uneasy with his peevish mood, but he could not help but reward Lieutenant Johnny McKay's feeble attempts at conversation with anything more than an icy glare. Goldman was unable and unwilling to pretend that he wasn't pissed off by having to travel hundreds of kilometers to pacify a man for whom he held no respect, but he did find a twisted sense of enjoyment out of snubbing the arrogant chopper-jock.

Smug in his ability to disquiet the entire crew, Goldman reached into his pocket and grabbed a cigarette from a crumpled pack, lit it and inhaled deeply. As his nose and mouth expired the gaseous fumes, his thoughts drifted back to the smoky streets of Saigon after the explosion that destroyed a popular G.I. hangout.

And destroyed my life, he held with disdain.

Myron was suddenly reliving the horror of Alex Devlin being blown away by a terrorist bomb. Every detail of her death was imbedded so deeply into his memory that he often feared that he would never be able to recover from it. If only I hadn't told her I would meet her there. If only I had seen her sooner. I should have protected her. It should have been me. It fucking should have been me.

Peering out the door, Myron found himself fighting the sudden urge to jump

***********

Walking briskly across Da Lat Army Base to the tactical operations offices, Myron Goldman seized the rickety steps into the building two at a time and put his hand on the crusty doorknob. Before he could bring himself to open the weathered door, Myron hesitated just long enough to contemplate desertion as being a more palatable alternative to the confrontation that awaited him on the other side. The lieutenant stood firm, searching for his courage as a cold chill surged through his heated veins

General Martin Goldman's fact-finding mission that had begun nearly ten months earlier was nearing its close, and the war hero's only son was pissed off that the two had not managed to avoid one last encounter.

The elder Goldman's visit to Firebase Ladybird a few months before the siege that destroyed her had done no more than bring the two men to civil terms. They were far from being friends, and other than the surname that they shared, there was no indication that they had ever been family. What little existed of their pathetic father-son relationship lie in as great a ruins as Ladybird, only rebuilding would be far more arduous, if not impossible. Myron Goldman had never gotten along with his old man, and had convinced himself that he never wanted to.

The soldier's anger at being ordered here to the base at Da Lat further muddied his already tormented mind, and he wondered if he would be able to control the raging emotions that he knew would be intolerable to his patronizing father.

Taking in and releasing a deep breath of saturated air, the platoon leader turned the doorknob and entered the battle-scarred building. He held his head high, even as he braced himself for the admonition that he was certain would come. Why would the Old Man order me here if not to point out something else I've fucked up? His father, the lieutenant knew, had never learned to separate his two worlds, and still always managed to find some flaw in his son, no matter how many medals the Army pinned to Myron's chest. I don't need this, dammit. Not now.

Closing the door more gently than his state of mind had foreshadowed, the lieutenant stepped into the room and looked around. As his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, Myron felt his heart skip a beat when his gaze fell upon the vision of a beautiful Vietnamese woman waiting outside the door to the General's inner office.

Neglecting the purpose of his visit, Goldman stood staring at the woman, drinking in her radiance. She was young, no more than eighteen or nineteen years old, taller than most Vietnamese and the curves of her slender body were well defined behind her tight-fitting, summer dress. Her long, black hair fell across her bare shoulders, a deep blue sheen highlighting the silky mane. Her skin had a luminous glow and her walnut-shaped eyes whispered a shyness that Goldman was immediately drawn into. There was something familiar about her, leading Myron to believe that the two had met before.

"I...I'm sorry for staring," he stammered, removing his cap from his head, twisting it between his restless hands. "But do I know you?"

The woman glanced around as if she were searching for the person to whom the soldier might be speaking. Finding no one else in the room, she looked down at her feet and responded in a quiet, thickly accented voice, "No G.I. You must mistake me for somebody else."

Goldman licked his lips and narrowed his eyes, intent on identifying the memory that eluded him. "No, I'm sure we've met somewhere before. Are you from Saigon?"

Before she could reply, the commanding officer's door opened and the lieutenant looked over and into the eyes of his father.

"Sir," Myron greeted, snapping a formal salute to the man before him.

General Goldman sighed and returned the gesture. "Myron," he said in a weary voice. "It's good to see you, Son. Come in, won't you?"

Lieutenant Goldman was surprised by the fatigue he saw on his father's face, but said nothing as he lowered his salute and placed his arms behind his back. As he moved to go into the small office, the platoon leader looked again into the pretty eyes of the mysterious woman who stood just to the right of the door. With his father waiting in the entrance to the room, Myron would have no choice but to pass between them.

"Ma'am," he said politely as he brushed against her slender form. He was certain that he could smell jasmine in her hair and his cheeks flushed at the abrupt adolescent waking of his hormones.

***********

Closing the door behind them, General Goldman allowed a small, pleasant smile to cross his lips when the younger man extended his arm. "It really is good to see you again, Myron," the general repeated, shaking his son's hand. "Thank you for coming."

The lieutenant eyed his father warily, pushing aside his thoughts of the woman on the other side of the wall. "Well, Sir," he countered, "It's not like I had much of a choice, is it?" Myron relaxed his posture only slightly, bending his leg at the knee but leaving his arms behind his back, one palm resting in the other. He kept his eyes fixed on a point of the wall beyond the other man, intentionally allowing them to lose focus, and waited for the expected response.

Instead of the usual retort, Martin Goldman ignored his son's sarcasm and went straight to the purpose of the meeting. "I need a favor, Myron," he said grimly. "You're the only one I trust enough with this, and I wouldn't ask if I had any other choice." The general looked into his son's deep brown eyes and was not at all surprised by the shocked expression he found there.

"A favor?" the lieutenant asked, his voice incredulous. "What kind of favor can be so important that you have to pull me away from my men in the middle of a fucking war? Who the hell do you think you are?" Myron knew he was overreacting, having not even waited to hear the request through, but this was simply more than he could handle. All he wanted to do was to get back in the field and leave the general's damned favor where it belonged--in the crapper.

"Myron, please" the general soothed, his voice pleading for the other man to listen. "Hear me out. I wouldn't have called you here if it weren't important." Both men fell silent as they struggled to remain calm. Myron's eyes darted around the room, subconsciously taking inventory of its contents as if the diversion might end this uncomfortable conversation. He never flinched when his eyes fell upon his own framed portait that had been placed on the top of the modest desk.

General Goldman sat down in a chair that had been placed against a wall near a filing cabinet and rested one arm on his lap while rubbing at his eyes with the other. The sound of his voice immediately commanded Myron's attention. "The woman outside needs an escort to her ville and I want you to provide it."

Myron's eyes widened in disbelief. "What the hell are you talking about? An escort to what ville? And why me?" For a brief moment, his thoughts drifted to the woman with the lovely black hair and its soft flowery scent, but he refused to succumb to the distraction of her beauty. Pulling himself back into the argument, Myron declared, "No, Sir. I am not risking my neck for some broad I don't even know. Who is she, anyway?" An awkward silence again filled the room as the older man lowered his eyes to avoid his son's gaze. "What? Is she your mistress?"

"No, Myron, she is not my mistress, and even if she were, that is none of your goddamned business."

"The hell it's not," the lieutenant spat. "It's my ass you're putting on the line." The two men glared at each other as a realization suddenly hit Myron Goldman square in the face. "Oh, shit. She's your daughter, isn't she? Son of a bitch. You bastard!"

Martin Goldman sprang to his feet and grabbed his son by the collar. A bitter tension filled the room as the two adversaries braced themselves for the ultimate battle. Shaking with a violent rage, the general forced himself to release his grip and quickly backed away. "She's not my daughter," Martin said in a low, trembling voice, "but her mother was my wife."

Myron slapped a hand to his forehead as his mouth dropped open in shocked incredulity. His mind reeled at the avalanche of hostility that threatened to overtake him. Lowering his arms to his sides, he stepped back until he was leaning hard against the wall, his body shaking with torrid emotion. "Your wife?" he blurted trying to understand his father's confession. "What do you mean, your wife? What the hell are you talking about?"

"I don't expect you to understand, Myron. I was going to tell you, but I didn't know how." The general sat down again, and looked into his son's blazing eyes. "We met nine months ago, shortly after I arrived in-country on my tour. I was visiting a ville to gather information on our relocation programs. I didn't go in there looking for this, Son. It just happened."

Myron could not find his voice. All he could do was stare at his father in a combination of stunned amazement and horror.

Uncomfortable with his son's glare, Martin gathered his composure and continued. "Ri An, the girl outside, left Vietnam several years ago to attend school in Paris. She flew in to Da Lat last week to meet her mother here so that they could both come home with me."

Lieutenant Goldman cleared his voice and forced himself to speak. "So where is she? Your wife?" He could not disguise his contempt.

A terrible look of remorse crossed the general's brow, making him appear older than his years. "She was killed," he explained, his throat choking on the words. "Just outside the base. Our chopper was about to land when a sniper got her. The bullet was intended for me, Myron, but it found Lihn instead."

Myron saw tears fill his father's eyes. He didn't know what to say, so he just stood there, eyeing the general doubtfully.

"Anyway," the general continued, "Ri An was already here when it happened. The hardest thing I've ever had to do was to tell her that her mother wasn't getting off that bird."

Myron's eyes narrowed. "The hardest thing you've ever done? Fuck, Dad. Where was your grief when my mother died?"

General Goldman had no patience for getting into this particular argument with his son. "You know what I meant, Myron. Don't twist my words." Before the lieutenant could utter his reply, Martin blurted, "Are you going to do it or not? Yes or no, Son."

"Do what?" Myron was stunned. He had completely forgotten the nature of the general's request.

"Will you take Ri An to her village?"

As much as the lieutenant wanted to pummel the Old Man and his twisted sense of duty, Myron recalled the exotic woman on the other side of the wall and imagined himself lingering in her perfume for the few days that it would take to escort her to the village. The diversion would not be unwelcome and maybe it would help him come to terms with the general's disclosure. With a reluctant sigh, Myron lowered his defenses and accepted the painful assignment. "What's the ville and what kind of support are you giving me?"

The general stood, obviously relieved that his son had agreed to help. "It's Bin Duoc. You've been there before, about a year ago. I can't give you any support since this is not a tactical operation, but the area has been clear of NVA activity for months. You shouldn't meet any hostile forces."

"Right. I've heard that before. You know, General. You're asking a hell of a lot from me."

General Goldman crossed the room and placed a hand on Myron's shoulder. "I know, Son," he said. "Believe me, I know."

***********

The jeep hurried down the dusty road to Bin Duoc at breakneck speed. Myron held a cigarette between the fingers of his hand that rested on the steering wheel. His other hand laid across his lap, occasionally reaching for his visored cap to keep the wind gusts from swishing it off his head.

He glanced over at the woman sitting in the passenger seat beside him. She had been outfitted in Army fatigues, more suitable for the trip to the ville than her creamy white sundress, but certainly not as flattering. Her long hair was pulled back in a tight knot and she wore a cap similar to Goldman's, but without the embroidered rank insignia. Without thought, Myron lowered his eyes to admire the soft skin of her cleavage that was revealed by the wind flapping at her shirt.

Sensing his gaze, Ri An glanced at the lieutenant, clenching her collar and pulling it more closely together. Aware that he had been caught, the soldier offered a brief apologetic grin and returned his eyes to the road.

"I thank you for helping me, G.I.," a soft, sweet voice said, breaking the constrained silence of the trip.

"Myron," the soldier offered. "Call me Myron. And it's okay. There's no need to thank me."

Ri An turned in her seat so that she was better facing him. "No, there is a need. You see, it is very important for me to go back there. To find my sister."

Goldman looked at the woman and frowned. "Your sister?"

"Yes. She disappeared during the relocation of our village and my mother did not see her since then. I must find my sister and tell her of our mother's death." Ri An lowered her eyes as they filled with liquid sadness.

Curling up the left side of his mouth in a boyish smile, Myron took his free hand and wiped the tear that rolled down her tender cheek. "Hey, none of that, now," he consoled. "We'll find her. I promise." Reluctantly, he pulled his hand away from her face and returned his focus to his driving just in time to see a large hole that spanned the entire width of the limited roadway in front of them.

Slamming on the breaks, Goldman turned the steering wheel hard, forcing the jeep into a tail spin. Forward momentum caused the vehicle to continue to slide, and Ri An screamed as she lost her balance and careened into the officer's side.

In a reflexive motion, Goldman wrapped his right arm around the terrified woman and pulled her into him as he held his breath and waited for the outcome of the accident, whatever it might be. A moment later, the jeep came to a halt a few feet in front of the opening to the ominous pit.

The lieutenant released the air from his lungs and tried to control the wild beating of his panicked heart, but he could not bring himself to let go of the trembling woman wrapped around him. Her slender arms clung to his waist as she buried her head into his chest, hiding from the impact that never came. Goldman took his hand off the steering wheel, flicked his still-lit Marlboro into the mud and rested his palm on the back of her head, marveling at the silky texture of her hair.

For just a second, she looked to him like a frightened schoolgirl at a horror movie that a boyfriend might have dragged her to for the sole purpose of eliciting this type of reaction. Myron had to consciously work to dispel the sudden desire to kiss away her fear. It was neither the time nor the place. Instead, he wrapped his hands around the woman's delicate arms and pulled her away from him. "It's okay, Ri An. We've stopped."

She gazed into the soldier's encouraging brown eyes and allowed herself a tentative glance out at the road. When she looked back at Goldman, she saw that he was smiling, a soft, friendly smile that comforted her. She could not help but smile back.

"That's my girl," he said playfully, resisting the urge to draw her honey lips into his own. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, all right?"

Ri An nodded her head. "All right, G.I...Myron. I trust you."

"Good. Wait here." He gently set the girl back on to the passenger seat before hopping out of the vehicle to check out the hole.

Just as he had suspected, it was an extremely large spike pit, obviously constructed to consume grunts who were humping the roads instead of staying in the brush. The axle to the pivoting door that would normally camouflage such a pitfall had apparently been broken, leaving the trap exposed. Even before Goldman made his way to the side of the hollow, he could see the filed points of the bamboo rods and the unmistakable smears of blood staining many of the spiked tips.

The lieutenant nearly gagged when he approached the pit and saw the gnarled face of a freshly dead soldier, whose vacant eyes continued to scream of the ghastly death to which he had fallen.

Myron backed away, afraid that he would retch, but when he turned around, he saw that Ri An was climbing over the side of the jeep. "No!" he ordered, his commanding tone immediately immobilizing her. Aware that he had alarmed her more than he had intended, Goldman ran back to the vehicle and gathered the frightened girl into the security of his strong embrace. "Ri An, you don't want to go there. We'll find another way."

***********

Lieutenant Goldman led his ward to the rear of the vehicle so that he could keep an eye on her while he retrieved their supplies. He had not intended to go into the hamlet on foot, but as always, he was prepared for the worst. The jeep was fully loaded with water, c-rations, weapons and ammunition. Without a word, he quickly outfitted himself in his boonie gear, checked his rifle and prepared to move out.

Without warning, the silence of the jungle was broken as the embittered soldier cursed the grim situation in which he found himself because of his father's reprehensible conduct. "Shit!" Goldman swore, his mind continuing its struggle to banish the horrific image from the booby trap. He kicked the jeep's muddy tire with such force that he could feel the vibration of the blow all the way up his leg. "Fuck him!"

Not understanding the man's sudden outburst, Ri An laid a petite hand on Goldman's shoulder and asked him, "What is wrong, G.I.? I am sorry to make you come here."

Ri An was standing so close that Myron could feel the warmth of her breath caress his cheek. Her sweet perfume wafted through his senses, calming him; stirring in him a strong desire to draw her in to him. She had lost her hat and the bun had fallen from her hair, leaving a long, silky ponytail flowing down her delicate neck. With the wisps of hair that had escaped their confinement brushing across her face, Goldman could not help but believe that he had been with her before. She was so entrancing. He was certain he knew her from somewhere in his past.

"I do know you, don't I?" he whispered, his words trembling with an inexplicable longing. He cupped her face in the palm of his hand and shivered as a breath of wind swept her satin mane across his lips.

Without animosity, Ri An pulled back, forcing the lieutenant to release his hold on her. She lowered her eyes and turned her head in a coy, familiar way. Myron's inclination was to allow her to withdraw, but instead, he slid an arm around her back and pulled her close again. She offered no resistance as he laid his mouth on hers and gently kissed her. His touch was soft and warm without intruding, yet he could still taste the fullness of her magnificently sweet lips.

Myron opened his eyes and slowly pulled himself away just enough so that he could meet her ebony gaze. He saw a fear there. A fear that no doubt existed because of a terrible lifetime of war and misery. "Ri An, I'm so sorry," he choked, wishing he could go back in time and withdraw his impudence. "I didn't mean to frighten you. It's just that I...." His voice trailed off. Goldman knew his kiss had been inappropriate, but he was helpless to retract it. He had been charged with protecting this delicate bird from the dangers of the jungle and instead he had responded by advancing himself upon her.

When Ri An failed to reply, Goldman drew in his breath and stepped around her so that he could pace to the front of the jeep. He reached around the steering wheel and pulled the keys out of the ignition, tossing them into his pocket next to a crushed package of cigarettes.

"Let's go," the officer ordered, commanding a coldness into his voice that repulsed even himself. "We better start humping before it gets dark."

***********

The jeep had been stopped no more than a few klicks away from their destination, but Lieutenant Goldman knew it would be far too dangerous for them to follow the road into the ville. He led Ri An through the jungle, instructing her to follow directly in the path he laid out for her. The lieutenant had enough experience in the field to know what to look for, but having never before been in the position of walking point, his heart raced and sweat quickly accumulated on his anxious brow. Mryon was not afraid for himself, but he knew that if he missed a trap or a wire, he alone would be responsible for the consequences.

An uneasy quiet hovered over them and Goldman became acutely aware that the usual noises of the jungle had ceased to exist. Crickets and birds had stopped their chirping, and no screaming came from the monkeys that surely inhabited the surroundings. The only sound came from Goldman's own heavy breathing and the steady hum of a million insects.

Myron stopped and glanced over his shoulder to confirm Ri An's presence. She was so quiet in her movement that she floated through the terrain like a feather in a summer breeze. The hunger for her continued to prickle at the soldier's senses, no matter how hard he tried to focus on their objective. "There's a storm coming up," he whispered evenly, hoping she would not hear the tremor in his voice. The fact that his beautiful charge knew more about the jungle than he could ever hope to learn never crossed his mind.

Ri An smiled. "Yes, I know. But we are almost there. We can find shelter in the village."

The lieutenant stopped walking and turned around so that he was facing the girl. "Listen, you know Bin Duoc is deserted. We blew it up. There shouldn't be anything there but ashes."

"Lieutenant, American soldiers destroy our village, but they can not destroy our home. Come. I will show you."

Having been returned to the world of her ancestors, Ri An suddenly seemed stronger and more self-assured. She gave Myron a smile and crossed in front of him, taking his hand to lead the way. He grinned, realizing there was no point in discussing the matter. In an instant, the tables had been turned and the daughter of this strange land was suddenly in control.

When they reached the clearing, Goldman was met with a horrendous sight of decimation and waste. The small village had been annihilated. Hootches were burned to the ground. The well had been swallowed by a gaping crater made by his platoon's long ago released grenades ~Fire in the hole!~ and twined baskets that once stored rice for the villagers lay empty on the ground in scorched tatters. Stripped carcasses of chickens and livestock dimpled the ash-covered earth. There was nothing left here but the wind.

Ri An hesitated only a moment before slowly making her way into the heart of the devastation. Myron was sickened by the sound of brittle kindling crunching under her boot. He watched her move among the ruins, his heart sinking with the knowledge that it was under his command that this woman's home had been forever erased from the annals of time. He had nothing to offer to sweeten her heartache. No words of encouragement. No hope for tomorrow.

So he stood there. And he watched.

"Lang is not here," Ri An announced, turning to the lieutenant. Her eyes conveyed a sadness that filled the officer's heart with compassion. "No one is here."

The words broke the soldier's trance and he forced himself to approach the distraught young woman. "I don't know what to say, Ri An," he uttered, stroking the base of her neck under the long black ponytail. "I just don't know what the hell to say."

Unable to speak, Ri An slowly dropped to the ground. Kneeling on a patch of leafy plants that reached out through the soot and the ashes, she raised her eyes, silently pleading for solace from the man before her.

Lieutenant Goldman lowered himself to one knee, and placed his arms around her shivering body. As he held her in his consoling embrace, Ri An wept for all that she had lost.

And it began to rain.

***********

The drops came in a steady downpour, not unlike the hundreds of other rainstorms in which the lieutenant had been soaked during his tour of duty. There was no wind, no thunder, no lightning. Just a drenching assault on the two unprotected bodies that huddled in the clearing.

Myron was relieved when Ri An's heavy sobs quieted and she burrowed her body into the crevice of his arms. The feel of her in his embrace ignited his unremitting longing for her, but he did his best to ignore the temptation and instead forced his focus to the burned out hamlet. He looked around the clearing and glanced down to suggest to his ward that they move out of the opening. The lieutenant was surprised to see that the girl was again staring at him, her mouth turned up meekly as the rain splashed against her lips. Seized by her quiet sensuality, Goldman abandoned his anxiety and lowered his head to kiss her.

This time, he could not hold back and he parted her lips with his own, allowing his tongue to slip comfortably inside her bewitching smile. Ri An did not resist his overture, allowing him to taste her as he lured her deeper into his hold. The soldier's tongue danced over Ri An's mouth, his teeth teasing her with tender nibbles, his lips guiding her willing response.

Suddenly mortified by the thought that he was taking advantage of this poor woman's misery, the soldier pulled away.

Again ashamed by his advances, Myron sat back, leaning his body on the heel of his boots and gazed into the woman's brilliant eyes. "Ri An...." he choked, trying to make some sense of his unsolicited desire. Before he could utter another word, the wonderous Vietnamese beauty raised her hand to Myron's unshaven cheek and comforted his torment with a single touch.

Taken aback by her tenderness, Goldman remained speechless. He could not deny his intense longing to exploit her vulnerability and yet he was afraid of her. He had taken advantage of Ri An's grief to relieve his own and in return she had given him a kindness and a gentleness that he had never before experienced. As his mind flooded with self-recrimination, the beautiful woman spoke, admonishing his uncertainty.

"Myron, there is no wrong in what you feel. I want this as much as you." She smiled so sweetly that Goldman could not help but smile back. He stroked her neck and carried his touch down the length of her back. He stayed there caressing her, satisfied just to be so near her, until her next words threatened to exchange his contentment for tears. "Until you stop hating, G.I., you will never know how to love."

Shocked by the sudden knowledge that this woman had been able to see through the shield of his emotions, Lieutenant Goldman closed his eyes and turned away. As much as her mystique had penetrated his desires, Ri An's insight had even more deeply penetrated his very soul. A torrid flood of hurt and despair engulfed him as the uncontrolled yet vigilantly shrouded rage swelled within him. His mother's suicide. His father's detachment. Nikki's abandonment. Alex's death. He had lost too much to the Army. Too much. And Ri An somehow knew.

Seeing his sadness, the mysterious woman placed a hand on his shoulder and drew herself into him so that their mouths could again meet. She used her tongue to open his lips and explored his mouth as he had done to hers before. Without hesitation, Myron Goldman succumbed and lost himself in her passion.

******************

Breathless and suddenly aware that they were still exposed in the clearing, Myron pulled away from Ri An's embrace and grabbed her wrist, pulling her into the thicket of the surrounding jungle. He lowered himself to the ground so that he was sitting on a wet cluster of vegetation, and leaned back against a thick, sappy tree trunk. Still grasping Ri An's arm, the soldier pulled her down onto his lap and held her tightly in his embrace. He could feel her shivering from the rainfall that had already ended, but had left their clothing wet and cold.

With Ri An coiled up in his arms, Goldman looked around and was relieved to find that he had had the instinct and foresight to return to where he left his rifle and gear. He reached over and grabbed the rucksack, pulling it closer to them. Lifting the flap, he found a folded up rain pancho, which he pulled out and opened, laying it across Ri An's shoulders. He knew the pancho would offer little warmth against the dampness of her clothing, but the act seemed to soothe her and she lowered her head onto his chest.

Myron pushed the ruck aside and picked up his rifle, leaning it against his shoulder. He rested his hand on Ri An's neck and absently swirled his fingers through the lush hair he found there. As he felt the girl's body relax into his own, he rested his cheek against the top of her silky head and drifted off to sleep.

***********

Lieutenant Goldman woke with a start. He was still leaning against a tree with Ri An curled in a ball on his lap, resting her head against his chest. Again he was flooded with an incredible sense of familiarity, as if he had lived this moment before. He shook his head and struggled to remember some long forgotten memory that drifted just beyond his consciousness.

He did not want to stir the delicate woman who slept in his arms, but the sun was already low in the western sky and he knew they had very little time to return to the jeep before nightfall. "Ri An," he whispered, gently shaking her. "Let's get ready to move out."

Groggy and disoriented from her slumber, Ri An was slow to respond to Goldman's voice. She lifted her head and blinked heavily, trying to focus on her surroundings. As her sleepy cobwebs disintegrated into awareness, she glanced into the lieutenant's eyes and offered him a modest smile.

Goldman's eyes widened in astonishment as his mind was suddenly flooded with the evasive memory he had worked so hard to restore. Ri An's sleepy face was so obviously similar to the exotic woman that had captivated the lieutenant during the relocation of this hamlet nearly a year ago, he could not believe he had not noticed it before.

Myron Goldman recoiled into the tree behind him. "Lang. Your sister is Lang. Oh, God, Ri An. Why didn't you tell me?" He used the trunk of the tree to help get himself standing, leaving the girl alone in the grass. He quickly stepped away from Ri An, holding his rifle at the ready, scanning the surrounding area as if an enemy assault were imminent.

Ri An was frightened and bewildered by the soldier's erratic behavior. Afraid that she had done something to upset him, Ri An slid the rain pancho off her shoulders as she gathered her shirt more tightly around herself, shivering against the dampness of the still soggy material. Goldman could see the tears welling in the woman's large black eyes.

"No, Ri An, don't cry," Myron pleaded, kneeling down and caressing her cheek. God, her skin is soft. "It's not you. I promise. We just need to get out of here." He kissed the top of her head in a quaint, patronizing way that made him feel like a fool. Touching his lips to her long, black hair, he was again seized with the desire to kiss her mouth, but knowing the truth of her identity, he had no choice but to pull away. But do you have to treat her like shit? She deserves better than this.

Deciding it didn't matter, he stood up and briskly walked away.

As soon as Ri An finished tying her hair back into its tightly wound bun, she stood up and approached the lieutenant who had moved into the clearing, pretending to be preoccupied with the perimeter. Positioning herself in front of the lieutenant, she stared him in the eye and with an unexpected boldness, she jabbed a slender finger above the top button of his shirt, into the taught skin of his exposed chest.

"Who do you think you are, G.I.?" she barked, drawing his exasperated attention. "I am not a whore in Sin City that you can treat like this." Calming her voice, her face softened as her eyes begged for an explanation. "Why are you afraid?"

Goldman lowered his shoulders and looked around the village. Satisfied that they were still alone, he took the agitated woman in his arms and drew her near. This time, when he kissed her hair, there was a tenderness that helped them both to relax. "You are so beautiful, Ri An," he said, his voice almost a whisper. "I don't want to hurt you. It was never my intention to hurt you." He pulled away from her enough so that he could look into her haunting black eyes. "I didn't know."

"You didn't know what, Goldman?" A sharp edge returned to her confused voice. "That I am Vietnamese? That my home is this village that you and your men destroyed?"

Her words stabbed at the soldier, making him choke on his remorse. "No, Ri An. I didn't know who your sister is. I know Lang. Or I guess I should say, I knew her."

The young woman's eyes widened in her misunderstanding. "You were with my sister? In this way?" Myron could see the hurt and confusion in Ri An's eyes. She turned away as a tear rolled down her cheek and she curtly brushed it away as if her hand could deny its very existence.

Before she could step away, Goldman grabbed her arm and turned her around so that she was forced to look at him. "No, Ri An. Not in this way." He glanced down at his boots and searched for his next words, wanting her to understand but not wanting to cause her any further pain. "Lang is beautiful. Very beautiful. I...I wanted her, but I never had her. She never wanted me."

A silence fell between them and Myron allowed it to linger before he broke it again. "She is married to a VC. He could have killed me...he should have killed me, but he didn't. The last I saw her, she was running into the jungle to join him."

"That is how I last saw her, too." Ri An raised her hand to wipe away another tear and ran her tongue over her lips. Seeing the dryness of her mouth, Goldman removed the canteen from his hip and unscrewed the cap, offering it to the girl. When she was finished taking a drink, she returned it to the lieutenant and watched in silence as he raised the canteen to his own mouth. Myron never took his eyes or his wonder off of the Vietnamese beauty before him.

After he quenched his thirst, Goldman replaced the canteen to his hip and made sure that he had collected all of his gear. Satisfied that they had everything they needed for the hump back to the jeep, he started walking. It did not take long for the soldier to realize that Ri An was not following.

"Come on, Ri An. We need to get back. before dark."

The woman stood her ground. "No, G.I. I am not going back with you."

Goldman's brow furrowed. "What do you mean you're not going back. There's not a damned thing for you here except a lot of ashes. Now let's go."

"You go back. My home is here. Lang will come soon. They know to meet me here."

Myron glanced around the burned out village, annoyed by Ri An's sudden and unexpected strength of will. "You're crazy. How the hell would she know that I was going to bring you here today. I didn't even know that."

Ri An's voice remained patient as she explained to the lieutenant the circumstances of their journey. "No, Myron. I did not say she knew you would be here. I said she knew I would be here. When Lang's husband joined the freedom fighters, our mother was afraid. Our father was killed because he refused to join. They killed him for his 'disloyalty' to their cause. My mother, she wanted to take Lang and me to Paris--away from the danger of the war--but Lang refused to go. She wanted to be here when her husband returned from fighting."

Goldman's mind was whirling with this unwelcome information and his memory flooded with images of Lang leaving the safety of her family to join the Viet Cong guerrilla. Ri An interrupted his thoughts as she continued her tragic story. "Our mother, she told me that I was to be sent to Paris even though Lang refused to come with me. I went alone because our mother could not leave Lang alone here. She always stayed nearby. Watching to make sure my sister was safe.

"When Lang disappeared during the relocation of the Bin Duoc, our mother never saw her again. Mama lived sad and alone in a refugee camp until your father came and said he would help her find Lang to bring our family together again.

"I do not know how he did it, but General Goldman somehow found my sister and arranged for her to meet my mother and me here today. He said he was sure you would help us because you have a kind heart. And you do, because you are here."

She paused a moment to stroke the stubble on Myron's chin. "We did not expect my mother to die before this day, but Lang will be here."

Ri An's words trailed off and again a silence hovered in the air. Goldman raised his eyes and stared into the trees, blinking hard to drive back the welling tears of his despair. As much as he wanted to flee the hamlet and any possible contact with Charlie, the soldier knew he could not take this young woman away from her last chance to be with the only family she had left, nor could he leave her here to wait alone.

"All right, M'lady," he said with a joyless twinkle in his eye. "We'll wait. But if she doesn't show up by 18-hundred hours, we have to go. No arguments. You understand?"

Ri An smiled. "I think the phrase to use is, 'Roger that'?"

Amused by her spark, Myron leaned in to kiss her, but before their lips could meet, he heard the unmistakable sound of an AK-47 being locked and loaded. The lieutenant bolted upright, but as he moved to swing his rifle off his shoulder, he heard a soft, female voice tell him, "No."

Time stood still and suddenly Myron felt like he had been transported back in time to a year before. He looked up and saw on the other side of the burnt down village, the image of Ri An's stunning sister. Lang was dressed in the black pajamas familiar to the Viet Cong and she held her rifle steady, pointing it directly at Goldman's stomach.

Ri An spun around and as soon as she saw her sister, her face beamed with excitement. She returned her gaze to the lieutenant, but when she saw the melancholy in his eyes, her expression fell. She slowly turned to look back again at Lang, but made no move to join her. Goldman recognized the girl's hesitation, and he knew it would be up to him to release her.

"Ri An, go. I won't stop you," he promised, relieved to see her turn around and show him her lovely face. He raised his hand to her cheek to wipe away another tear and ran his fingers through her silky black hair, purposely unwinding the length from the bun in which Ri An had so recently tied it. Leaning into her ear, he inhaled her sweet perfume one last time, and whispered, "She's your family, Ri An. It's okay. I understand."

Myron closed his eyes to savor the gentle kiss that was offered in lieu of a spoken reply. It took him a long while after she slipped away before he could bring himself to open them again and watch her disappear with her sister into the shadows of the jungle.

"Go now, G.I." Lieutenant Goldman was forced out of his trance by the memorable voice of Lang's husband. "You will be watched as you return to your vehicle but you will not be harmed. I suggest you move quickly."

Myron nodded his understanding, picked his rucksack off the ground and paused, looking into the disheveled streets of Bin Duoc. "Have a safe journey, Ri An," he said to the emptiness. "You're home."

***********

The flight back to Tan Son Nhut was quiet, but not uncomfortable. Myron sat alone in the passenger compartment, his thoughts drifting to the beautiful Vietnamese woman he had left behind. He saw Lieutenant McKay turn around in his seat, a concerned curiosity filling his eyes, but Goldman simply smiled and looked away.

Reaching into his pocket in hopes of finding a cigarette, Myron's fingers instead wrapped around a crumpled piece of cardboard harbored deep in the recesses of his fatigue shirt. He pulled out the paper, unfolding it in a perfunctory motion and revealed the beautiful smile of Lieutenant Nikki Raines as she appeared in the only photograph he ever had of her.

Nikki.

He stared at the photograph for a long time, wondering what in the world had gone wrong with that relationship, when his wandering mind suddenly replaced the faded image of his first love with a bloody vision of Alex Devlin's murdered corpse. In the photograph, he saw the clammy hand of a rotting cadaver resting on the shoulder of his sharply pressed dress uniform. Her mouth was open in a grotesque smile, blood trickling from her once-ravishing lips. Her eyes were rolled back in her head, as they had done the day he held her for the last time, watching in horror as they closed forever.

With an abrupt jerk of his head, Goldman expunged the phantasm of his mind's eye, and again he was looking at Nikki Raines' sweet smile. Myron glanced around the chopper, relieved to find that no one was paying any particular attention to him. He folded the photograph along the permanent crease made by the many months of being stored in his pocket, but instead of returning the picture to its usual residence, he hung his arm out the open compartment and released the memory into the wind.

The soldier watched the paper flutter through the air currents, feeling no remorse as it disappeared into the murky jungle below.

*******end*******